Goldstien at the Circus
A fellow is walking down the street in his hometown. He spots a poster for a circus in town. It mentions the usual circus-y things and ends with: “And the Amazing Goldstien!”.
He decides to check it out. There are clowns, trapeze artists and lion tamers. Finally the Ringmaster steps into the spotlight and announces, “Ladies and gentlemen, the act you’ve all been waiting for! The Amazing Goldstien!”
A frail-looking small man with wire-rim glasses and thinning hair steps into the spotlight and approaches a table with three walnuts lying on it. He whips out his massive two-foot long penis, uses it to whack each walnut in turn and cracks them open! The crowd leaps to their feet and break into thunderous applause! Our local man is astounded.
20 years later, he happens across the same poster, still advertising: “And the Amazing Goldstien!”. “My God,” he thinks, “He was ancient the last time!”
Sure enough, they save the best for last, and Goldstien slowly walks out. Now completely bald, he is bent over and even shorter than last time. His glasses are now very thick.
He walks up to a table that has three coconuts on it and repeats his performance from 20 years before. The crowd goes wild!
Our local guy just has to talk to him, so he finagles his way backstage after the show. He introduces himself to Goldstien and says, “Last time, you used walnuts. Why the coconuts?”
Godstien replies, “Well, my eyes aren’t what they used to be!”